Happy Memorial day

I have been chided by a work friend for not forcing and creating memories between Jon and I.

i wouldn't say that we weren't, certainly not intentionally, but I can tell you that the illness has largely prevented us from some of the routine things that we used to do together.

Today, one my best girlfriends invited us over to cook out. He cannot eat solid food, but we went anyway.

What she figured would happen was that he would sya the upright bass in the corner or the piano and we would lose both he and Lizz.

Well she was right. And thank Goodness.

He really needed the music today. He lit up. Like a tree. At Christmas.

Lit up - I'm not kidding.

I wasn't in the room part of the time, but he called me in at one point and asked me to play a chord progression on the pano for him ( all my music friends can please stop the laughing now... ) and after a few tries, I did finally get it.

Then he moved onto to something else. So I sat and listened. sometimes I sang what I could remember of the tunes ( they weren't his usual because he canoot sing those things).

But he did play You are the susnshine of my life. I was touched because I love that song.

We re-established the connection even if he was being a bit of a plick with me. the eye contact was there. The connetion was back.

I was relieved.

When we got home, he flipped open the Beatles Orchestra scores that he has to Filling a Hole. Turne the light on and called me in from the kitchen.

"Play this" he says.

"Umm... OK" I think - I haven't heard this tune in a long time so this is going to be interesting.... key of F, ummmm not too hard...OK....

We start playing, he gets his guitar and the two of us start jamming... It was so much fun. Just us.

Then hs says.... "I beat you up pretty bad at Ellie's today. I wanted to give you something to play that would make you realize that you DO KNOW WHAT YOU ARE DOING - I've just been doing it longer...."

I had my back to him but I turned and looked at him and smiled.

" You did beat me up. But it wasn't bad. It just pointed out to me that there are stil things that I need to tighten up - I'm better than I was but nowhere hear where I need to be in music theory.... No wonder I had trouble in college theory!"

Then the doorbell rang.

My neighbor next door is probably the lightest sleeper I know. He's also one of the best people I know. So last week when he slipped the note under my door about the TV volume at night on the day that I had my car accident, I was not as responsive as I normally am.

So we had a nice chat. He felt badly for bringing it up and I felt badly that he was losing sleep. We have a great relationship, thank goodness. I do not understand how his other neighbors can be so. umm, high maintenance.

Then he realized that Jon was really not rebounding well. He and I talked a bit about the disease the course it has taken. He got teary eyed... so I took him out to the hall and gave him a hug.

When I returned, Jon wanted to know what happened. So I told him. He looked at me and said "Now I am going to write HIM a note and he'll really get misty when he reads it!"

We both laughed but then we talked about how he had said how he hates when bad things happen to good people and how Jon is such a good guy and how we deserve each other because we are such good people and how unfair and unjust the whole thing is.

And all of that is true.

tomorrow is round two of Chemo. We Pray that the ant-nausea meds made it to facilty otherwise we are going to have a hideous week. They can't be sent to a pharmacy they must go directly to the hospital.

I do not expect this round to go as smoothly as the last one but I pray that it does. I pray he regains his voice and I pray he doesn't lose his hearing.

And then I just pray for us and for life.