Tuesday, April 24, 2007

On a lovely nature meditation

This afternoon I got blown off by a student.

They weren't just late - they were REALLY late.

I arrived early to their home at 6:10. I rang the bell and got no answer.

So I figured they were enroute, so I sat myself down on the front steps, turned on my IPOD and watched the sun set.

It wasn't a terribly unique or colorful sunset. There wasn't anything truly spectacular. There was a lovely breeze and it was about 70 degrees out.

As I sat there listening to Sunday Morning by Maroon five, my sunglasses on, my eyes closed... I realized I was smiling. I was at peace and all was right with the world. And finally my mind is at ease.

It was a lovely 30 minutes that I sat there. I just kind of let my mind go blank and thought of nothing but the actual moment I was in. It was wonderful and peaceful. And the first meditation where my mind wasn't wandering in a thousand and one directions.

I walked away from that house, having not taught the lesson, having no actual communications with the family and not in the least bit worried about it. I left them a message and will go back on Thursday.

That call that's been on my mind for a couple of weeks came in this afternoon. When the phone rang, I actually looked at twice, dumbfounded. I wasn't actually expecting it to come so quickly. Once I made my decision to not worry about it, it got easier. So when it came, I was able to be proactive rather than reactive. It went much better than I thought it would. The impasse is still there, but it's breaking down slowly.

If God exists, he exists in moments like these.

1 comment:

post-doc said...

I'm so glad you feel so peaceful and happy. It's absolutely wonderful to hear. :)