Post Mortem's

I have made a decision. There will be a new movement to eradicate the use of the word Post-mortem for anything other than it's actual definition.


Post-Mortem as defined by Websters Dictionary -

1. Occurring after death 2. Appraisal following an event where negative actions occurred.

I am spear-heading the movement to stop using this word inappropriately. It should be used only in the instance of negative or truly questionable actions having taken place that need to be reviewed to prevent those actions from taking place again.

It does not, in any context, have good connotations. And those of you in the technology industry can verify that. In our industry,. when a circuit fails, or a server crashes - a post mortem is demanded and expected by the client to determine what actions took place from a corrective standpoint and what situations occurred to cause said outage in the first place.

If anything positive is included in these reports it is RARELY acknowledged as that is the wrong medium to include it. I, personally, include it for future references when emotions are riding so high and people can reflect and see that everything that was done, was done in the spirit and best interests of the client.

How does this translate to my personal situation? I had my "post-mortem" or as I am now calling it "my performance notes" this morning. I went to my coaches home and we discussed certain facts.

1. He doesn't like my stage presence or audience Acknowledgment. I don't agree completely but there are some points that I do agree with. I would rather be off book so I can communicate better with my audience while performing. He felt I should use a stand - that wouldn't work for me. I'm too short, it needs to be too high, my voice would be drowned out - you see the problem. He also feels that I don't allow the audience to appreciate me, I bow too soon. I'm not that cocky. We'll see if I can pull off something to meet him halfway at my performance in March.
2. He still feels that my German is weak. It is weak. I know that. He told me that " I was lucky Crystal wasn't there" . First of all, I have no idea who Crystal is. Secondly, unless my great-aunt herself told me my umlauts sucked, I'm not buying into it.
3. I felt that my high notes were running a little bit sharp in some places. That Hall is wonderful for not making me work too hard, but it does show pitch issues. I run high when I am nervous and I knew it that day. the recordings just gave me specific areas to work on.
4. I mentioned it before, but the program was too ambitious and he agrees with that. The next one will be less ambitious and will be set earlier so I can work the pieces towards memorization.
5. I felt that the tempo's were slow and that though I pushed them in places, he pulled them back. There cannot be a tempo or ego tug of war. If I push the tempo , he needs to trust ME too and go with it. There isn't a soprano on earth who can get through Der Holle Rache at the tempo he started it at. That was a train wreck waiting to happen.
6. I felt that, in general, I spent more time catering to his performance nerves than my own.
7. The creative control is back in my hands.
8. We do work well together, but a dress rehearsal in full has to happen the week of.
9. I will not be doing any songs that he loves. Shepherd on the Rock is his favorite and I paid dearly in criticism for it. No German pronunciation was going to be good enough for him. He acknowledged that. He is overly critical of that piece because it is his favorite.
10. Overall a success, he was proud, he felt my dad was proud and we are OK.

I told him that in the future, I would prefer him to not mention my performance notes existence even until the next day. I don't want to be worrying and second guessing myself.

I learned a lot about myself with this performance. My stamina ( I was pleasantly surprised ) was high, My voice is much fuller than it was a year ago. I want it to be even fuller, so I need to work on that. There is a breathiness that comes in and out at times - I need to consistently get it out. I need to practice my German as it does need work. I need to work on my pitch in my upper notes. I don't know how I could pop F's out and have them be sharp seriously. That's just crazy talk!

I have another performance in mid March - just one or two tunes. I am doing the only one that wasn't on this last performance. I am very excited to sing it too as it is one my favorites.

All in all - things are OK. But I am starting the revolution to make sure that the terms are used appropriately.